Laugh-May2014

Questions and Answers

Teacher: Students, you have forty minutes to write an essay on a soccer match.
Richard: (After two minutes) Here’s my paper, sir.
Teacher: What did you manage to write so quickly?
Richard: Match called off due to rain.

Teacher: How do you spell “monkey”?
Student: M-O-N-K-I.
Teacher: You are wrong! The dictionary spells it M-O-N-K-E-Y.
Student: But, you asked me how “I” spell it, sir!

Teacher: When were the first and second World Wars fought?
Student: I don’t know about the first, but the second World War was fought after the first.

Dad: Son, this time I expect 80 percent marks in your final examination.
Son: No Dad, I think I’ll manage 100 percent.
Dad: Don’t joke with me.
Son: Who started the joke?

Teacher: Harry, show me America on the map.
Harry: (Pointing on the map) It’s here.
Teacher: Correct. Now William can you tell me who discovered America?
William: Harry, ma’am!

In the school, during a mathematics class…
Teacher: If I were to ask you to add 8,137 to 73 and then divide the result by two, what do you think you would get?
Student: The wrong answer, sir.

Teacher: Who succeeded the first Emperor of Rome?
Pupil: The second one!

Teacher: What was the greatest accomplishment of the early Romans?
Pupil: Speaking Latin!

Why aren’t you doing very well in history?
Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I was born!

Teacher: Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is?
Pupil: I expect it’s around Hadrian’s garden miss!

Question: What was the first thing Henry III did on coming to the throne?
Answer: He sat down.

Why were the early days of history called the dark ages?
Because there were so many knights!

Teacher: Can you tell me something important that didn’t exist 100 years ago?
Pupil: Me!