The Tip of the Iceberg: Making Friends in College
Posted on Thursday, June 27th, 2019
“I’m having trouble making friends in college. I’ve met some cool people in class, but everyone already seems to have their own social circle. On top of that, it’s hard to coordinate schedules and find time to hang out. How do I make closer friendships?”
The paradox of college: despite literally being surrounded by thousands of peers, it can be hard to meet people. These 10 tips will increase your chances of hitting it off with a new crew of friends.
1. Have realistic expectations.
Don’t pressure yourself to meet your new bestie right away. You probably won’t click with most of the people you meet. It might take longer than you want to find your niche, but don’t despair! Keep putting yourself out there.
2. Be open to new experiences and personalities.
Cast your net wide when searching for new friends, and avoid quickly judging or dismissing others. College is your opportunity to branch out and get to know people you might not meet otherwise. Interacting with a variety of people will broaden your horizons while helping you to better understand which qualities you appreciate most in friends.
3. Expect some awkwardness.
It’s completely normal to be nervous when entering new situations. Striking up small talk can be intimidating, but try to push yourself a bit outside your comfort zone. Remember that others probably want to meet more people too, and will appreciate you being friendly.
4. Be yourself.
If you feel like you’re trying too hard to fit in, maybe you are. Hate the bar scene, but all your classmates want to do is go for a drink after night class? There’s no need to force it. At a large school like Algonquin, you’re bound to find others with similar interests, and it will be easier to relate if you’re genuine. Try not to worry about others judging you – just focus on finding people who truly appreciate your vibe.
5. Be present and approachable.
Mixing up your routine can boost your chances of meeting others. Study at a large table in the library instead of in your bedroom. Do your readings at a coffee shop instead of on the bus. Don’t be on your phone or wear headphones all the time. Make it easier for others to talk to you.
6. Make the first move.
Don’t wait around wishing that others would chat more or invite you out. If you’re ready for it, say hi first! Strike up a conversation about class, the weather, whatever. If the thought of that terrifies you, try group counselling to get some tips and practice.
7. Build on what you have in common.
Tackling the next assignment or getting ready for the next exam is much easier as a team. A study group can be a great way to transition from just saying hi in class to actually hanging out together – while getting better grades! Ask around to find out if one already exists. If not, why not start one yourself? Check out this how-to guide for tips.
8. Take advantage of campus events.
When time is in short supply, doing things on campus can be more convenient and casual. Ask your classmates if they’ve checked out the upcoming events at the Ottawa, Perth, and Pembroke campuses.
9. Bond over hobbies.
It can be easier and more natural to make friends when you share an interest. Browse Algonquin’s Clubs and Communities – there’s really something for everyone! – or start your own. Find a buddy through a sports team or fitness class (and don’t forget to grab smoothies together before the game). Not athletic? No worries – try Mood Walks at the Ottawa campus. You can also search for local off-campus meet-ups. Try to go regularly to a group’s events so that you see the same bunch of people often.
10. Help others.
Helping others naturally creates a strong bond, while boosting your resume! Join a Community Project through the AC Hub Volunteer Centre, or consider signing up for the International Student Mentor program.
Good luck!
– Eliza, Counsellor
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